Fixed vs. growth mindset is, like, eating at me as I sit in my messy Ohio apartment, coffee mug gone cold, staring at a pile of laundry I swore I’d fold last Tuesday. It’s 3:22 PM, the sun’s poking through my grimy window, and I’m wondering if I’m stuck in my ways or growing like the dandelions I saw busting through the cracks on my walk to the gas station. You ever catch yourself thinking, “I’m just not cut out for this,” or maybe, “Screw it, I’ll try painting even if my last art project was a hot mess”? That’s the fixed vs. growth mindset deal, and I’m gonna dump my sloppy, human thoughts on it—screw-ups, doubts, and all. Bare with me, I’m no pro, and I might ramble or mess this up.
Why Fixed vs. Growth Mindset Keeps Me Up at Night
So, I’m sprawled on my couch, surrounded by self-help books I haven’t finished (don’t judge, okay?), and this fixed vs. growth mindset thing keeps smacking me upside the head. I thought I was all about growth—like, “I’m evolving, watch me shine!”—but then I bailed on a photography class last month ‘cause I was sure I’d suck. I literally told myself, “I’m not artsy,” like I peaked at finger-painting in kindergarten. Carol Dweck, the genius who cooked up this idea, says a fixed mindset thinks your skills are carved in stone, while a growth mindset believes you can get better if you try . Figuring out I was leaning fixed hit me like a bad burrito—kinda queasy and super embarrassing.
- Fixed mindset flop: I bombed a karaoke night at a dive bar last week. My brain went, “You can’t sing, stick to humming in the shower.” Brutal.
- Growth mindset win: I signed up for a baking class after, even though my last cake looked like a deflated tire. Baby steps, yo.
My Super Cringey Fixed Mindset Moments
Okay, real talk, and I’m cringing just typing this. I’m chomping on some stale pretzels, the kind that taste like cardboard, and I gotta admit: my fixed mindset has led to some epic faceplants. Like, last summer, I tried pickleball at this community center in Toledo—picture me, flailing like a drunk giraffe, missing every shot in front of a crowd of retirees. Instead of laughing it off, I sulked, yanked off my sneakers, and muttered, “I’m not sporty.” I can still smell the gym floor and hear those old guys chuckling. That’s the fixed mindset trap—thinking you’re doomed to suck forever. Psychology Today nails it: a fixed mindset makes you dodge challenges to save your ego. Yeah, that’s me, hiding in my car after, eating leftover fries.
My buddy Alex did the same thing—he quit his coding bootcamp ‘cause he “wasn’t a tech guy.” Sound familiar? We’re all out here boxing ourselves in sometimes, and it’s, like, stupidly human. I’m trying to break free, but it’s a mess.
Growth Mindset: My Awkward Stabs at Getting Better
Alright, let’s talk growth mindset, ‘cause I’m trying, y’all, even if it’s clumsy. A few weeks back, I was at this bougie coffee shop in Cincinnati, the kind with $7 lattes and hipsters judging your order. I overheard some chick raving about learning French on an app, and I was like, “Why not me?” So, I got this language app, and let me tell ya, my French is tragic. I accidentally told my neighbor I’m “a table” instead of “tired.” But instead of deleting the app, I laughed, scribbled it in my journal, and kept going. That’s growth mindset—embracing the suck and pushing on. This TED Talk by Eduardo Briceño totally got me—it’s about diving into the “learning zone” even when you feel like a doofus.
Here’s my half-baked plan for leaning into a growth mindset:
- Forget perfection: I started tracking my fails, like when I tried making tacos and the tortillas disintegrated. Writing it down makes it less scary.
- Small stuff counts: I’m trying one new thing a month, even if it’s just learning to boil pasta without it sticking (spoiler: I still mess it up).
- Ask for backup: I joined a local book club, and yeah, I’m the quiet one, but they’re cool and keep me going.
Fixed vs. Growth Mindset: Where Am I Right Now?
Real talk? I’m a total mess of both. Some days, I’m all “growth mindset, let’s do this!”—like when I finally landed a decent yoga pose after falling on my face (my rug still smells like sweat). Other days, I’m stuck in fixed mode, like when I skipped a work meeting ‘cause I was sure I’d sound dumb. Sitting here, with my coffee cold and my cat knocking pens off my desk, I’m realizing the fixed vs. growth mindset thing isn’t a one-and-done. It’s a daily grind, and I don’t always pick the right side. Harvard Business Review puts it perfect: growth mindset isn’t about being a rockstar; it’s about being okay with sucking and trying again.
Tips for Nudging Toward a Growth Mindset (From a Total Mess)
I’m no expert, but here’s what I’ve learned from my flops:
- Own your screw-ups: That baking class? My muffins were like rocks, but I’m proud I didn’t ditch it.
- Find your hype squad: My friend Lisa keeps me going, even when I wanna quit. Find your Lisa.
- Cheer the tiny wins: I legit danced when I cooked rice without burning it. It’s small, but it’s something.
- Call out your excuses: When I say, “I’m not good at this,” I try to add, “…yet.” It’s cheesy, but it kinda works.
Wrapping Up This Fixed vs. Growth Mindset Ramble
So, here I am, slouched on my couch, pretzel crumbs on my shirt, trying to sort out this fixed vs. growth mindset mess. It’s chaotic, it’s human, and I’m definitely not acing it. I’m leaning toward growth, but I slip back into fixed mode sometimes, and that’s fine, I guess. Wanna know where you stand? Think about the last time you tried something new—did you keep going or bail? Scribble it down, tell a friend, or hit me up in the comments. Let’s keep this growth mindset thing going, even if we’re tripping over ourselves.
